Apathy is the new black

When I found out I got to write an editorial, the first

thing I thought was, "What pisses me off?" Turns out, the list goes on and on, but none of the real hot-button issues (soon to be pressed and considerably cooled) made me upset or inspired enough to add something new to the table. With that being said, I now aim to highlight the seldom complained about, yet frequently "grievanced," issues

that exist on Xavier's campus. I do not do this with the aim to

trivialize the more important matters. Quite the opposite. I

hope to trivialize things that we all complain about Way.

Too. Much. But before we get underway, I offer these helpful generalizations: "I regret to say that I am offended by the term "Jesuit Catholic" (comma omitted) in its suggestion that Catholicism comes in different brands. Fr. Joe Wagner, S.J. Associate Professor Now that we've got that business out of the way, we can address the real issues:

Randy's

A combo of Ryan's Pub and Andy's Mediterranean Grill,

Randy's has become a staple of Xavier's campus. A staple like the ones that you use at home to try and close a

wound but it just keeps on bleeding. Insert money for blood and you understand Andy's. Now, realize it's all your fault. Yes, it's new and yes, it doesn't serve all the same food and

YES (the one you really care about), it doesn't take meal swipes. Sorry, it just doesn't work cost-wise, (so I assume) but that doesn't change the fact that Andy's is a locally-owned small business with quality products that can use our support in its first year here. I hear the reason Andy is there all the time greeting people is because he isn't making enough to justify hiring someone. I don't care if that's true or not, the thought alone is despicable. Embrace the

new. If we liked the old so much, then I think it should be an all or nothing. Hire back all the staff that worked at Xavier in

January. Everyone in a residence hall, find yourself a third

roommate. Looking for a study space? Search for no empty

chairs in Gallagher. Want to go to college? Hope you have

a Y-chromosome. The past is so yesterday, and if Hillary

Duff said it, you know that it's time to move on.

The Randy's Coupon Guy at the bottom of the GSC stairs

I'm all for Randy's (see above) but really guy? Stop wasting paper and stop forcing your affordable wrap into my hands. No thank you, means no thank you! The Pool Kids Where do they come from and where do they go? What sort of alien technology have they acquired to make their music the

loudest and clearest out of any playing in GSC? Do they ever go to class? These burning questions and more bounce around in my head every time I attempt to "do homework" by the Gallagher fire. I recognize some faces and believe there is some type of system as to who can play pool and when, most likely tournament style.The system is just like Mortal Kombat—with less death. Yeah, I said less. In any case, these men and women have unparalleled skill in an activity that holds no reasonable value. But answer me this: how would you feel if they were gone? Sure, the

first day it might be quieter, but then you would miss their laughter, their revelry, their 3 a.m. joy that makes your soul burn. You know as well as I that they are the happiest and most tight knit group of friends on campus, and you hate them for it. Either dust your cue or find another building,

friend. This clique is here to stay, hopefully. It just wouldn't be Gallagher without them.